Reckoning With #YOUTOO!!!

It is interesting to me that those most uncomfortable with or struggling most to grapple with this current "reckoning of America" if you will, are liberal white folks who have to come to terms with their complicity in the systemic traumatization of Black Americans. Typically it is they who are in the chorus with Black folks calling out and pointing fingers of blame and shame at republicans and other racists for some egregious or blatantly discriminatory deed. This time however the Black choir members are turning to [on] their fellow carolers and saying to them #YOUTOO!!! The "good liberal" white folks, you know like Amy Cooper, the white woman in Central Park, NYC who relied on translation and understanding of the racism in her coded language used to convey a false claim of distress to the 9-11 dispatcher that a "big Black man was trying to rape her" all the while being filmed to the contrary, are beside themselves that Black folks think #themtoo complicit in harms experienced by us because of race.

Some Black folks have always said they prefer the overt, in your face kind of racism associated with the southern experience as opposed to the back door, behind the scene, smile in your face while twisting the knife in your back racism typical of the liberal north. There is a sense that at least with blatant racism, one knows where they stand.

Liberal whites who have been gatekeepers and all too willing beneficiaries if not practitioners of racism themselves have mistaken silence and tolerance by Black people as acceptance or forgiveness for the pain they conveniently ignored but have wreaked in our lives and seen on our faces. These folks are having to come to grips with the fact that marrying Black, adopting Black babies, holding jobs in the helping profession, having a few Black friends and the like does not absolve them from holding racist beliefs or at the very least being complicit in the perpetuation of racism and certainly it doesn't make them any kind of authority on what it means to be Black in America nor a natural "ally" to Blacks in America.

A prime example of such an awakening was when Black folks decided to back Barack Obama's candidacy for POTUS instead of Hillary Clinton's. The Clintons and the Dems lost their mind! I only wish I could find the footage of Geraldine Ferraro. She all but said, "after all we have done for you "Ninjas". She could not contain her anger. Little did she realize that it was in fact Blacks who, year after year, had done for her and the Dems with our loyalty in voting. Bill and Hillary behaved badly too. Yes, #THEMTOO!

Hillary paid a price for this during her 2016 run. Black folks did not forget and did not show up at the polls for her as she and others assumed we would. The Dems never quite understood that the overwhelming support of Barack Obama was all about the candidate more than about the party. They took Black voter support for granted and did nothing to thank us for our vote or to keep us engaged in politics and then wondered why we didn't show up with the same enthusiasm in 2016. They blamed Black folks instead of examining themselves. Of course they did, good liberals who think we should be forever grateful for "all they do for us". I digress...

I am watching and listening as I see all these corporations and non-profits responding in varied and interesting, but undeniably awkward, ways to send messages of gratitude and support, if not veiled apologies, to Black customers and employees who they have abused, underpaid, disrespected, ignored, disregarded, devalued and discriminated against, not hired, not promoted, denied agency or contracts, etc in the workplace. Some are making Juneteenth a holiday, Uber Eats is waiving fees for deliveries from Black owned restaurants and even the NFL is magically embracing one's right to protest and offering to re-hire Colin Kaepernick. It's all quite fascinating to watch as they fall all over themselves to say mea culpa or try to have the "difficult" conversation about RACE as it pertains to Black folks that heretofore they have avoided with deliberate intent. They concentrated instead on all kinds of "others" in the guise of diversity rather than deal with how Black folks were feeling and being treated in the workplace. Now they want us to listen to the words they cannot find and would not hear from us when we tried to express ourselves and put words to what we were experiencing. It's a great time to be in the business of race and/or cultural competencies. Contracts are coming from everywhere!

To self proclaimed allies:
My advice is to just listen during these conversations. Don't correct Black people in what or how they express their feelings. Don't interrupt and interject how you feel. It ain't about you right now. Black folks are sick and tired of holding it in and together, we are exhaling a collective release of pent up anger, frustration and pain. So white women, gay people, disabled people, people of color who are not Black and even Black people who aren't Black (you know who you are), this is not your time. Do not sit in these conversations and divert the energy and subject matter to discussions about you. We have been hearing all about you and have been supportive and respectful to issues pertaining to you ever since we fought for rights that gave you a voice and/or a seat at the table we prepared. Yes, #YOUTOO, all the while standing on our shoulders, have served to drown out the Black voice. Sometimes it has been you who has had a foot on our neck. So if you must be in the room and are not leading the discussion, just be there and be quiet. Let the panther have his day...

"Panthers don't hunt humans. Although in some cultures people believe that black panthers are dangerous animals, this isn't true. Panthers only attack if they feel threatened, so if you leave them alone, they will leave you alone."

To liberal whites:
Like the panther, Black folks just want to be left alone, treated right, respected, not taken for granted and not hunted like animals by those paid to protect and serve us. And when that doesn't happen, we need you good liberal white folks who are now having such a hard time finding the right words, time or place to speak up, to stand with us even when it is to your own detriment, even at the expense of releasing your grip on "white privilege", that elusive ideology that has become the convenient excuse for explaining away all that is unfair but of course in your favor. To offer an acknowledgement of white privilege as though it is some inevitable, unavoidable, inexplicable condition is falling on deaf ears. Find a new tune, the choir no longer appreciates those lyric. They have no melody nor meaning...


To Black Americans:
Black folks, stop harboring your pain. It is not healthy for you mentally or physically. It falls on us to not let this reckoning or conversation about race and the reality of living while Black in America to die. Like #METOO, there must be a #YOUTOO movement. No longer should we ignore, rationalize, internalize or excuse away pain or insults heralded at us at the risk of our being labeled "angry", "combative", "overly sensitive" or "confrontational" by those who have mastered use of these labels to avoid or deflect from discussions of race because it makes them uncomfortable. Is not our comfort important? Have we not internalized enough pain or discomfort for just being Black in America? We must resist tolerance of being other people being offended at our expense, no matter who the offender when it pertains to race, Black folks specifically. In real time or as close to the offending act or event as possible, inform the offender of his or her behavior. Lift your voice and sing loudly, #YOUTOO! Be not concerned with the discomfort of the offender. Look that person straight in the eye and tell them #YOUTOO are responsible for the trauma I endure for simply living while Black in America. Tell that person, be it your neighbor, your friend, your colleague, lover, supervisor, teacher or college professor, co-worker, a fellow parishioner or some other self proclaimed ally, your banker, your lawyer, whoever it is, when they offend, disregard or marginalize you, tell them, #YOUTOO! You are the best advocate for you and we teach others how to treat us. So far our lessons have failed. No one seems to hear our song. It is time to adopt new practices, teach a new lesson, sing a new song with new lyrics.  We are breathing, feeling and thinking human beings who hurt but who have beautiful and powerful voices and we sing. Folks love to hear us sing so let's entertain them. We must lift our voice in harmony in our continued pursuit for equality and liberty. Until our victory is won, Lift Ev'ry Voice and Sing! #OURSTOO!

Lift ev'ry voice and sing

'Til earth and heaven ring

Ring with the harmonies of Liberty

Let our rejoicing rise

High as the list'ning skies

Let it resound loud as the rolling sea

Sing a song full of the faith that the dark past has taught us

Sing a song full of the hope that the present has brought us

Facing the rising sun of our new day begun

Let us march on 'til victory is won

Lift Every Voice and Sing, Written in 1899 by James Weldon Johnson, set to music in 1900 by his brother J. Rosamond Johnson, adopted by the NAACP in 1919 and still revered today as the 

Negro National Anthem.