Be Reminded: Check On Your Peeps!

I'm sharing piece that I wrote 3 years ago upon becoming aware of the passing of a friend. I think it's important for us to be reminded To check on our peeps

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Today I called to check on a Friend who has been on my mind. For months, it has been my intent to call her. She has been quite sad for a very long time. Of course it was magnified in this time of COVID. Shame on me for not following my instinct. Good intentions don't change the result or the impact... 

I had left her a jovial, "shame on me for not calling sooner" message in her voicemail telling her to call me back. So when the phone rang just a few minutes later, I didn't even let her speak. Happy to hear from her, I went right into laughing and apologizing for not being in touch. When I heard a male voice, I assumed she had changed her number or it was her son telling me again that I was calling his Mom on his phone... I've done that before. It was the latter. It was her son. When I took a breath, giving him an opportunity to speak, he said "you don't know..." My heart dropped because I knew what was next... 

My Friend passed on August 9, 2020. Incredibly her husband passed ten days later, both from heart failure. They leave to mourn their loss, 3 sons (ages 34, 30 & 24). I was not prepared to hear this news. It knocked me off my feet. 

Life is so short and oh so unpredictable. Constantly I am telling folks to check on one another, mostly stressing the elderly. But we must check on all of our friends and family; the elderly, sickly, sad, lonely AND even those we ASSume happy. We never know what another is dealing with and should first assume that hearing from us, knowing that someone thought enough to call and say hello, will brighten their day. 

My Friend is gone. I am not sure when last we spoke. It has been quite a while. I know that after one of our last conversations, I sent flowers to cheer her day and asked a few other of our law school friends to reach out as well. We may have spoken a time or two since then but it has been far too long. Certainly not since the pandemic... I will miss her. 

We were both "senior", I prefer "seasoned", women when we started law school together. Her poor sons. They are devastated. Of course I will be deliberate in checking on them and of course I offered that they can reach out to me if ever they need anything or just need to talk. I lost my Mom at 26 so I share their pain. But both parents? Too sad... 

Ironically, just yesterday, I accidentally sent a text message to a cousin asking her to "call me" and then immediately let her know I had messaged the wrong "Linda". Her reply was something to affect, "OMG! I was wondering who died"... We must ALL do better at reaching out. 

Check on your peeps folks!!!  It means a lot...

~ Miss Higgi 

October 25, 2020