On Mr. Belafonte, The Loss of A Legend

The passing of Mr. Belafonte serves to remind us of who we used to be and who we could be. He was one of the few remaining faces and voices of who we should be. WE have abandoned us... 

I had the pleasure of hearing him speak maybe 10 years ago in Newark, NJ. I scrambled to have a front row seat, hurt neck from sitting too close to the stage be damned! It was worth every discomfort to sit at his feet and grasp his every word. He was so moving, deliberately thoughtful and intelligent in his unscripted delivery spoken straight from the depth of his heart and soul.

It was truly a night to be remembered. My front row seat garnered me an opportunity to ask our hero a question and to hand my copy of his book, to his daughter for him to sign. Mine was the first, if not the only, book signed that night, at least while he was on stage. It is a forever keepsake.

Reading his biography, My Song, introduced me to a Harry Belafonte I had not known, a true civil rights hero, a giant man of true character, a fearless man of integrity, a wise man filled with and fueled by unyielding confidence, unapologetic and non negotiable Black pride. 

My question to him that night in Newark entailed some lament for the loss of strong Black voices such as his, so prominent in the 60s. In his eloquent reply, he disagreed that his was a breed gone by, but that still there are leaders among us. He challenged that we listen to others and that we each lift our own voice. 

WE must heed and come to believe that his words of advice are true. Mr. Belafonte and so many before him have left us the blueprint. I thank them...

Rest in peace our mighty heroes. You served your people and our community well...

About "Freaknik," When Our Elders Speak

Do you all remember the beautiful woman in this picture? Her name is C. Dolores Tucker. She was a political force in Philadelphia in her day and in her latter days she ran a woman's organization in DC where I volunteered for her one evening and had the pleasure of being hostess to Judge A. Leon Higginbotham on my 34th birthday.  What a gift! 

I'm not sure you all know who Judge Higginbotham was but look him up. He would have succeeded Justice Thurgood Marshall on US Court Justice instead of uncle clarence, if only we had a Democratic POTUS at the time. Both he and C.D. Tucker have become Ancestors. 

I invoke Ms. Tucker this morning because yesterday I was listening to the Joe Madison show. As you all know there are established Black people who are now upset that deeds committed by them as young people at an annual festivity called "Freaknik" are now being made into a documentary and will be shown on air. Some of these people have probably since become judges and lawyers and doctors, college professors, pastors and school teachers and all other such respectable professions and of course parents and grandparents. Unfortunately this documentary is going to show glimpses from their youth of which they will not be proud.

Joe reminded me in his program yesterday that C. Delores Tucker was opposed to the new form of rap that showed Black women dancing provocatively, scantily clothed and being called bitches and hoes and encouraged and glorified our young men to be gangsters or thug-like. This is back in the 80s or 90s y'all, at the start of the denigration of rap specifically, Black music in general. 

Destructive and damaging lyrics replaced anything uplifting, positive or empowering to the Black community. The rhythmic, soulful beats, lyrics and messaging of our music were replaced with loud, harsh angry beats, sounds, lyrics and voices. Positive messaging the Black community was used to hearing in our music was essentially killed. Decent and respectful rappers could not get air time...

Ms. Tucker led   protests and asked for boycotts of this "music". She met with record company executives, appealed to our young rappers, rap producers and such to stop what they were doing to themselves and to our community. Their response was to absolutely disrespect our elder in every vile way. They threatened and verbally attacked her. Young Black BOYS, masquerading as men, cursed her, called her a bitch and worse and threatened her safety. It was horrible to witness. She was a staple and an elder in our community who had earned respect due her.

Fast forward, on yesterday Joe Madison recalled in their protests of this music, he joined C.D. Tucker, telling young people that one day they were going to be parents, have daughters and jobs, and they were going to regret that they behaved in this way, as they would have to explain it mainly to their children. This is pre-internet... Of course they told him what exit to take. They weren't listening to what he, Ms. Tucker and others had to say.

So now when I hear that folks who attended this annual event, got caught up in the moment and did God only knows what, with and to whom, are freaking out that their Freaknik deeds will be released in film, I am glad Joe reminded me of C. Dolores Tucker's valiant efforts,  foresight and love for our community. 

Reportedly attendees are attempting to sue HULU so that they cannot show this documentary. Is this a case of chickens coming home to roost, not for the masters or manipulators of this ongoing mass destruction, but those who succumbed to the[ir] lure? 🤷🏿‍♀️ 

Certainly I feel for my peers who are going to have some splainin' to do with their children, friends, congregations and such, I also see it as a blessing in disguise as we cope with far more distasteful behavior and acts of crudeness and lewdness from our youth today. Such  has almost been normalized.

I remember hearing Cardi B say that she doesn't allow her daughter to watch her videos, her music or whatever it is that she does. I'm not sure how long she thinks that's going to last. Of course her daughter will see what her Mommy does and says and what she, and others like her, promote. Of course she will have to explain to her daughter at some point the "why"...

Or maybe life in America will change such that rap lyrics and reality TV will become our reality, our new normal. Cultural values, self respect and pride, and for Black folks, community pride and morals will permanently become a thing of our past. Our young people accuse that preoccupation with such, is "Respectability Politics", wherein previous generations of Black folks were far too concerned with the opinions and approval of white folks. SMH... I cannot fault them. We, subsequent generations, dropped the ball on instilling tradition, values and knowledge of our history in them. Sadly, we must own it...

As youthful indiscretion sadly finds its way into adulthood, which could happen to any one of us, I am feeling like our Sistah C.D. Tucker is somehow being vindicated. She warned this generation of now respectable adults trying to shut down this documentary, that this day would come. I don't see this situation as much different than Woodstock. Young people from that historic and well documented event were also filmed doing the unspeakable. They also grew up to be parents and professionals, and also had some splainin' to do.

What do you guys think? Are Ms. Tucker and others who led this fight to save our community being vindicated? Will any of this trigger thoughts or corrective behavior in our current or future youth? What say ye? Were you at Freaknik? Are you concerned? Just a little? (smile)

When our elders speak, show some respect AND listen...

Apology Not Accepted

As disgusting as it is to see and hear the Dalai Lama abuse the little boy he asked to "suck his tongue", it needed to be exposed. Otherwise he would have denied it to the hills and WHO would have believed this poor baby if he had ever later told it? No one. It's hard to believe even seeing it happen. The Dalai Lama now apologizes, likely because he was caught on tape. His apology is not accepted.  He is not to be excused as a "feeble old man". He is a disgusting old pig who has probably victimized many a trusting child and God knows who else over the years.

Meanwhile, we want to crucify the Bill Cosbys and the R Kellys of the world when this guy and the Catholic Church, whose damage is far more reaching and around the world, are totally ignored. 

Have you ever considered how many pedophiles, drug addicts, sexual and physical abusers and other wounded people these predator "men of the cloth" have created? They have forever destroyed generations of innocent children based upon unquestioned trust afforded them by society at large,  unsuspecting parents in general, simply because of respect  for their religious standing.

We don't even respond appropriately when we know we should not have blind faith or trust in these people. Still, we reject or unhear the truth and look the other way as we hand our children over to these monsters to be irreparably harmed and forever damaged. We see our children changing right before our eyes and we don't know why. It's a shame...

Whenever I hear folks talking about "the talk" Black parents should have with our children, I remind them that if they have sent their children to a Catholic school or church, there is likely an overdue "talk" they need to have with their own children, minors and adults alike as this abuse has been going on for decades at a minimum. And now the Dalai Lama too.

This is the world in which we live. Our poor babies.

Talk to them...
Listen to them... 

Believe them...
Protect them...

Apology Not Accepted!

Easter Eve Musing...

I wrote this in response to someone's Facebook post regarding parenting and our children's values. In light of the holy season, Easter, Ramadan and Passover, ironically or not, all happening or colliding at once, it seems a good moment for reflection of this topic. Below is an embellished version of what I wrote.

It's funny you should post this. Just yesterday we were talking about Easter,  church, morals, values and things of that nature. I'm not an organized religion person at all, but I do question, when we abandon the church, what do we replace it with to teach our children what's right and what's wrong, that there is responsibility for what you do,  consequences for what you do, manners, that we should have compassion, care, and concern for others?

I don't know if or from where our kids are  getting that now that church is not at the center or core of many families. I'm not saying that it has to be the church that gives the framework for these things but from  somewhere it has to happen. While solely leaving such instruction to religious leaders or to school instructors was never the right thing to do  absent strong parental oversight to ensure our agreement with said teachings to our children, I am critical that parents/families are no longer stepping up to meet this task.

Maybe because in our zest to raise our  children differently than our parents raised us and to  give them more than we had as children because we can afford to or because we have been brainwashed or conditioned to believe that to do so is a sign of success, only to find in the end that what our parents were doing, and what our grandparents did, wasn't all bad after all. We've thrown out much of the "good" with the bad. It seems clear that some stuff we should have kept in place.

Teaching our children, or living by example modeling the very basic principles of good behavior or the value of being a good person, I think, have been abandoned. I don't recognize and often find myself not very much liking the behaviors, attitudes and responses of our younger generations. When they are children, I look at their parents.

We have a social problem that has only been exacerbated by the impact of COVID. Isolation of very young children in their formative years where, as a matter of practice, they learn social skills cannot have good results. No way... 

Telling our children they are all winners who never lose, modeling or creating obsession with "bling" as king, cannot end well...

I could go on, but back to the basic question. In our abandonment of  organizations of religion where presumably, children are sure to be taught at least the basic principles of humanity, where, when, how, by whom and with what do we replace teaching our children such basic, but very important, fundamentals of life?, a non-parent looking at us all through clear, not rose colored nor judgmental glasses,  respectfully asks.

As a society, what are we doing and how do we expect this will end? Do we even care? Better still, am I just getting old and intolerant of new,  longing for old or wanting to stop or turn back time for selfish reasons (smile)? Is what I ponder merely echoing lament expected of fading  generations going or gone by? Perhaps so... I'll accept that. 

What say ye'? Any thoughts? Do share...

Thank you for indulging my early morning Easter Eve rant...