Monday, October 8, 2012

Do Unto Others...

Anyone who knows me has heard me say over and over that I pride myself on living on by two very basic principles; (1) Treat others the way you want to be treated and (2) we teach others how to treat us.

While no one is perfect and certainly we all have those days when we lose our cool and say or do things that we might say or do differently given a retake, I find it hard to accept when folks are deliberately and consistently mean and nasty. My contempt is not reserved for the outwardly mean and nasty, I have similar disdain for the “passive aggressives”. You know those “nice”, meek, mild manner folks that everyone loves who smile in your face as they twist a jagged and honey coated knife in your back. They are actually worse than the overt mean guy because you didn’t see them coming. They are wolves in sheep clothing who, when confronted, will feign ignorance regarding the impact of their covert, but very deliberate and mean-spirited activity.  
 
No matter the inspiration or intent, I don’t get mean and nasty. I really don’t. It seems to take much more energy to be unkind than it does to be nice. If being nice and respectful of others presents such a huge burden, then do those around you a favor and be absent or indifferent. Just ignore us. When in doubt regarding the perception or impact of your behavior, imagine yourself as the recipient of YOU. How would your behavior make you feel? Warm and fuzzy? Respected? If not, ease up!!!

Conversely, if you are on the receiving end of Mr/Mrs “Congeniality’s” random acts of “kindness”, you have a responsibility to manage how you are treated. It’s all about perception. If you emit that you are a doormat, you will be walked upon and treated as such. If you exude confidence, love of self and a willingness to defend yourself, your adversaries, real or imagined, will make note of such and accordingly temper their interactions with and treatment of you. They will know, or come to know, that you will prove a force with whom they will surely have to reckon. Some will respect this position and not shy away from the inevitable show down, others will be intimidated and retreat or, at least, temper their behavior.

As long as you don’t pick the fight, another’s response to your defense of you is not your problem to manage. My advice is for as long as you can, take the high road and where possible, avoid confrontation. Try to diffuse or redirect the situation. However, when diplomacy, tact and civility fall by the wayside, handle your business!!! Push back HARD and push back DECISIVELY!!! Often I quote a pre-school teacher’s description of my younger sister’s social behavior; “will bite when provoked”. Translation – Don’t bother me, I won’t bother you.

It ain’t rocket science folks! Do Unto Others…

Wednesday, October 3, 2012

OnThis Day...

Talk about being blessed???

On Sunday evening I was helping a Friend in need. I went to retrieve her from the emergency ward of a hospital in the Philly suburbs. Of course there is no "in & out" at an emergency room... So I waited with her in her room for well over an hour.

When we were ready to leave, I realized that my purse was no where in sight! Of course I panicked and tried to retrace my steps. Thinking I must have left it in the car, while getting my parking pass validated, it occurred to me that I had stopped to use the restroom in the public waiting area MORE than an hour ago.
...

In a frenzy, I ran to the bathroom, flung open the door and MUCH to my delight and relief, there sat my purse. I thought surely my wallet was gone. NO, still there. Surely the cash, credit cards and SS card that I have been warned a million times to remove from my purse, are gone. NOPE, Still there too!!! My faith in mankind, RESTORED!!!

Of course I give credit and thank God for always watching over me but I gotta' give it up for good Karma. I do try and I am guided by "Do Unto Others". SOMETIMES, just SOMETIMES, it comes back and in a good way! 
 
Have a HAPPY Wednesday & Please Be Good to Others!!!

Saturday, September 22, 2012

Countdown to Victory!!!

44 Days To Re-Elect 44!!!

Here is the debate schedule. Be sure to tune in!!!

All debates will take place from 9-10:30 p.m. EDT. More details are posted at www.debates.org

Wednesday, October 3, University of Denver, Denver, CO
First Presidential debate (Domestic Policy)
Moderator: Jim Lehrer, Executive Editor, PBS NewsHour

Thursday, October 11, Centre College, Danville, KY
Vice presidential debate
Moderator: Martha Raddatz, Sr Foreign Affairs Correspondent, ABC News

Tuesday, October 16, Hofstra University, Hempstead, NY
Second presidential debate (Town Meeting)
Moderator: Candy Crowley, Chief Political Correspondent, CNN

Monday, October 22, Lynn University, Boca Raton, FL
Third presidential debate (Foreign Policy)
Moderator: Bob Schieffer, Face the Nation; Chief Washington Correspondent, CBS News

Bad Politicians are Elected by Good Citizens Who Do Not Vote!

See Ya' At the Polls!!!

LET'S GO WIN!!!

Saturday, September 15, 2012

Celebrating Me! 20 Years Smoke Free!!!

Today I celebrate 20 YEARS of being smoke free!!! OH YES YOU CAN do it too!!! Join me and commit to yourself to quit smoking or to give up whatever is your vice today!!!

Challenge yourself that you are stronger than the vice and that the vice does not control you. Assign an identity to your vice or associate it with something or someone. Each time you are about to partake think about who is winning, who is stronger, you or the vice? That is how I did it. Stopped Cold Turkey and It Feels Good!


No cheating. Once you quit, it is over. NEVER test yourself to see if you can occasionally resume your habit. You will lose EVERYtime, particularly if you enjoyed your vice. Before you know it, you will be smoking and vowing to quit again. So be true to you. Give it up! Quit today!!!

Saturday, September 8, 2012

DNC 2012!!!

WHEW! What can I say? The 2012 Democratic National Convention in Charlotte, NC was all that and more! Speaker after speaker drove home the importance of this election and why it is ever so crucial to get out the vote!



Former President Bill Clinton was the hit for Day II of the convention. Methodically, he took his time and point by point confirmed for us his commitment of support for the re-election of President Obama. The crowd went wild when at the end of his speech, President Obama joined him on stage. What a sight to see! Two great men of vision and distinction sharing the platform.

Sadly however on Day II news came that due to the threat of a thunderstorm, the venue for Day III had been changed from an open air stadium to the Time Warner Arena which was considerably smaller in size; 75,000 seats as opposed to 17,000. Needless to say, a lot of supporters were going to be disappointed. I am happy to say that I was not one of them! On Day III I had the pleasure of witnessing President Obama accept the party's nomination and that was truly something to see! By the way, the decision to change venues, was a good call, the storm did come...

Day III began with breakfast with the NJ Delegation at their host hotel. Arriving with just eight minutes to spare, I scurried downtown to get my pass for the evening's event. It was the hottest ticket in town and a long shot, to say the least. Although I'd received tickets for the previous two nights, with a change in facilities, all bets were off. Beyond delegates, there was uncertainty as to who would receive the coveted passes for Day III. Needless to say I was thrilled and walking on a cloud with ticket in hand as I floated down College Street to the convention center to attend the Women's Caucus. Much to my delight, among other women of noted distinction, First Lady Obama and Dr. Biden were scheduled to speak.

The ballroom, packed with mostly women, was in for a treat. The audience was energized with tales of triumphs and inspired with chants of female empowerment. The First Lady, in her usual graceful and dignified manner, re-enforced the importance of this race and the critical roles women can play in these last days of Campaign 2012. She reminded us of the power of women and charged that each of us roll up our sleeves, buckle down and get involved. If able, she encouraged that we get to the battleground states and work endlessly to help get out the vote. Back in our own communities, she encouraged that we get folks registered, make contributions, phone calls, knock on doors, whatever we could do. At a minimum, she challenged that each f us commit to getting no less than five people registered to vote and then encourage those five register five more!

While certainly I was moved by the energy created by the First and other ladies that morning, what stands out to me is the grace and confidence of First Lady Obama. Mrs. Obama and Dr. Biden were introduced as the "First and Second Ladies". Dr. Biden spoke a bit and then introduced Mrs. Obama. After thunderous applause and uncontrollable shouts of joy, First Lady Obama thanked us for our love and support and right away corrected that there was nothing second about her Friend, Dr. Biden. True to grace, she stood up for the honor of her Friend and left no doubt that she is comfortable enough in her own skin to share her spotlight. I would expect no less from our confident and gracious First Lady!

 


Although the event was not scheduled to happen for several hours, the focus was on getting there early to secure the best possible seating. So after a quick lunch with Friends at the Epic Center, which was packed with joyful people basking in the rays of the warm sun, being entertained by live music and randomly interviewed by roving reporters who were mostly broadcasting live, my good Friend and NJ Delegate, Joyce Walker, and I proceeded to the arena. It was only 2:30 pm and the event was not scheduled to start until 5pm, so we were in for a long wait. Our decision however was quite timely. Within minutes of our entering the arena, the sunny blue sky opened up and drenched the happy revelers with sheets of rain for about 30 minutes. These sporadic and sudden down pours had plagued us all week. So the decision of caution to change venues was well advised.

Because we were early we observed the "behind the scenes" preparation for the evening. Unexpectedly, we were entertained with Marc Anthony's sound check for the national anthem. That was a special treat and he did a spectacular job! Arriving early also affords one the opportunity to get to know the fellow attendees with whom you will share the evening. Our group was pretty lively and from all parts of the US and even one woman from Wales who has a relative named Nia Higginbotham. My last name is very British. She and I joked that we could be cousins. Spirits were positive as we buckled down for what was to be a long but energy packed night.

We were not disappointed. From the entertainment of James Taylor and Mary J. Blige to the President paying respect to his beautiful wife and family and accepting the nomination, the night was captivating. We were especially charged with the fire and energizing brimstone of former Michigan Governor, Jennifer Granholm. The entire audience came to life and cheered her on as she spell bounded and reminded us of the rewards and thousands of jobs saved by President Obama’s decision to save the American automobile industry. Congressman John Lewis reminded us of the struggles and great sacrifices he and others endured to move the country forward and vowed that we will not move back. I felt tears of pride and joy roll down my face as I was filled with memories of the spirit of the 2008 campaign and again inspired by a video featuring Ms. Edith S. Childs, the mastermind of the "Fired Up, Ready to Go!" slogan. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QhWDFgRfi1Q Watch it and be moved by the will of one woman and the humility of a great President who recognized and valued the support of even a small group of campaign supporters in Greenwood, SC. It is his kindness, his humanity and his appreciation for ALL people that so endears him to so many around the world. FOUR MORE YEARS!!!



As in 2008, I am happy to have been able to attend another historic and record breaking convention. In 2008 I was quoted for saying that we were going all the way; Helen Higginbotham of New Jersey says,” It’s not going to stop - we're going all the way! We WILL be in Washington IN THE White House and IT'S FABULOUS!" http://rochesterhomepage.net/fulltext/?nxd_id=28641 I knew it then, I know it now! I am FIRED UP, READY TO GO and look forward to seeing you at the polls!!!

Each One Register One!!!
 
 


Wednesday, September 5, 2012

DNC 2012 Day One!!!

Greetings From DNC Convention 2012!

After last night's display of fantastic and thoughtful speakers, I do not have to tell you that I AM FIRED UP & READY TO GO!!!

Tickets were hard to come by so I felt blessed from the beginning. My two goals in attending were to hear both the First Lady and President Obama. So I knew that I needed to get passes for both Tuesday and Thursday night events. Thursday night tickets were pretty much confirmed. I did not, however, have confirmed seating to hear the First Lady speak last night.

MUCH to my delight, one of my contacts paid off and I did manage to get in to hear First Lady Obama live. As it turns out, she was the icing on a very appetizing cake. From beginning to end, each speaker mesmerized the audience with dignity, grace, compassion, intellect and genuine concern for the plight and well being of ALL Americans! They engaged the audience and made clear that the choice in this election is very clear! VOTE FOR THE GUY THAT HAS YOUR BACK!!!

Throughout the evening I was texting away making sure that close Friends and Family were tuned in and not missing this spectacular event. As the night went on I could not believe that the next speaker could be any better or even compare to the previous speaker. I was happy to repeatedly be proved wrong. Amazingly, one after the other gave the most powerful and compelling speech I have ever heard some of them give. Fellow attendees and I high fived, chanted and cheered them on!

We were inspired by a colorful display of eloquent, passionate, articulate and strong willed Democratic Congresswomen and female Democratic candidates. The late Ted Kennedy was channeled via video clips and warned the undecided voter not to be fooled by the many faces of Mitt Romney who was equally inconsistent on the issues in 1994 during a Massachusetts Senator race in which he was soundly defeated by the late Senator. I texted my Friends that the party would be crazy not to use some combination of those videos for a strong campaign message. Mr. Romney leaves no room for doubt that he will say or do ANYthing to get elected. All of the speakers warned of the dangers of this type of "leadership".

Lilly Ledbetter was visibly moved by an audience that could identify with her story and her passion and appreciation for a President who believed in her, in women, in equality and never hestiated to sign a historic piece of legislation that will benefit all women. We witnessed the birth of one who could conceivably follow in President Obama's footsteps and be the next minority Presidential candiate. His speech and his story was phenomenal!!! Governors, Mayors, Real Families, Enlightened former republicans, etc., all challenged us to get out the vote and to leave no mistake about the clear choice and whose got our back in this election.

The evening began with Mayor Corey Booker firing up the base and concluded with First Lady Obama sealing the deal! While First Lady Obama was speaking, I texted to my Friends that in an arena filled to the rafters, one could hear a pin drop. She fully engaged the audience and commanded our total attention and respect. She is a First Lady in every aspect of the term. She looked positively stunning and every woman in earshot was impressed with her perfect physique. It was a wonderful evening at the conclusion of a perfect day!

Days Two and Three will be harpressed to outdo Day One. Stay Tuned...

Sunday, May 13, 2012

On This Mother's Day...

The video attached below is from, murder victim Trayvon Martin's Mother, Sybrina Fulton. Her words are very compelling. You can see her pain, feel her void, hear her sincerity... She wants that no other Mother is denied the sweet smell of success in celebration of their child's accomplishments. She wants to make sure that no other Mother has to endure the bitter taste of such senseless and avoidable loss...

Her heartfelt passion puts me in the mind of awakening in sunny Florida on Mother's Day 1997 following the ten year anniversary of my Mother's death. Resenting the pain of my void, I wrote and sent letters to her primary caregivers who I am convinced did not give my Mom the quality of medical care and attention she could afford but more importantly, that she deserved. I shared with them my displeasure with the service and advice provided and expressed to them the depth of my loss. I pleaded with them to be mindful of my pain and asked that going forward they commit to make it their duty to give EVERY Daughter's Mother the same care and advice they would give and want for their own Mother given similar medical circumstance. My Mother died from breast cancer on February 12, 1987. I miss her still...

One doctor is a female gynecologist, still treating and garnering trust of women who rely not only on her medical competence but who also ascribe to her, because she is a female, a badge of heightened concern and empathy, an assumed allegiance to due diligence in the care of women, AKA her "sisters". The other was a male oncologist. Both are still in practice. Of course neither doctor responded. Of course I did not expect them to...

Writing those letters however was therapy for me as surely making this video was for Ms. Fulton. I wanted those doctors to feel the depth of their recklessness. I wanted them to feel responsibility for their lack of regard for my Mother's life and the pain of the loved ones she left behind. I wanted that they recommit to their medical oath of service and that as they continued in practice, treating other Mother's daughters, although buried in the recess of their mind, that every now and again my words and my pain would resurface and resonate in the forefront of their mind and that they would consciously commit to do better! I can only hope...

I am certain that on this Mother's Day, her first without her beloved son, Ms. Fulton shares similar desires. No doubt that she wants george zimmerman, who abused the "Stand Your Ground" law, and proponents, who wrote and/or support this ridiculous law, to feel her pain, appreciate her loss and re-examine the purpose and usefulness of such irresponsible legislation... I am sure it is her hope that the Florida legislators and others realize the potential for abuse and the very real and very tragic human impact of this law, that they feel her pain, consider the pain of other Mothers and rescind and/or stop further consideration of similar legislation. She can only hope...

As a nation, we can do better... As a nation, let's love our Mothers...

Miss Higgi Says, "HAPPY MOTHERS DAY!!!" to all GOOD Mothers who, like my own Mother, do their very best to love, protect and provide for their children and who regularly give so unselfishly of themselves!!! It is your day and you deserve it!!!

Check out the video:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QrWgdQFgUQ4